Monday Moment: Hustle or flow

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We all want to be seen for exactly who we are. Yet, when we step out into the world, we’re afraid to show who that is. We focus outward, and ask ourselves, “Who do I need to be in order to succeed in this space?”

Adaptability is a survival skill. It helps us belong, which reduces the odds that we’ll freeze or starve to death, in a primitive sense. But as Brené Brown said in her recent Netflix special, belonging and fitting in are two different things.

Fitting in means molding yourself. Figuring out what “they” want, and giving it to them. Standing outside of your story, and trying to validate your worthiness based on what “they” need.

Belonging is owning your shit and being accepted for it. ALL of it. Yup, this is me, and this is all of my stuff, and take or leave it. This is my story. I’m gonna walk inside it, and know my worthiness is BECAUSE of it, not despite it.

So…what if you’re in a space where you have to adapt to thrive? Can you make being there a choice instead of an obligation? Can you preserve yourself in the process? Or, is it time to find a new space?

When we have the strength to own our story and present ourselves exactly as we are, looking for people and spaces where that true self is valued, we burst wide open, in the best possible way. Our potential becomes limitless, because we are operating with all of our personal power.

The truth is never good or bad, it’s neutral. It’s how we see it that makes it one or the other. As you wake up this Monday, how do you see your beautiful self? Spoiler alert, I just gave you a clue. ;-)

 


Monday Moment: Here for it

Brene Brown Courage or Comfort quote w tag

Of all the different journeys that mindfulness can take you on, the most profound space you find may be right where you started. One of the first things that happens when you start a mindfulness practice is that you get uncomfortable. Distracted, fidgety, bored. Frustrated,  judgmental, exhausted. If you check out then, that’s where you stay. I mean, you won’t realize it because you won’t be bored, etc. anymore, but all that will stay right there under the surface.

If you choose to come back, though, things start to shift. If you can sit with being bored or irritated without running away from it or doing something else to soothe it, then something else builds, too.

It’s called courage. Courage to show up and breathe through hard things. Courage that shows you that the “monster” you were scared of facing (those uncomfortable reactions) isn’t really as big as you thought it was. Stare at it long enough, and it will shrink, and eventually disappear.

Mindfulness shows you what’s really up with you in any given moment. It connects you straight to what you’re thinking, feeling, craving and avoiding. The challenge — the reason to keep trying even if it’s hard — is that learning to be present through those uncomfortable moments teaches you how to stay with yourself, no matter what, and also shows you that none of those experiences – fun or not – last.

Learning to tolerate discomfort (not pain! let’s be clear) allows you to be present for every moment of your life, and even more so – get to see what’s on the other side of it. Hint, hint: it’s usually some pretty amazing stuff.


Monday Moment: Growth opportunity

Brene Brown Courage or Comfort quote w tag

Leave it to Brené to start us of with a full-size dose of truth this Monday morning. Courage is such an appealing quality, and we all want to embody it, but it comes at a cost. By definition, courage implies that we have to get uncomfortable, and be willing to tread into territory that is unfamiliar to us. Although that may sometimes be exhilarating, it is often also pretty scary — hence, courage. It’s exactly the space where transformation occurs, though. If you can find what it takes to stay in it, you may also find that there is more to you than even you could have imagined.

Photo credit: Diego Hernandez